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To Be Happy, Act Happy

4/1/2014

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    While I was caring for my mother with Alzheimer’s, trying to feel happy sometimes seemed beyond my abilities.  So often we think that we must have the feelings of the emotion before we demonstrate it; that is, we should feel happy first, and then we will subsequently act happy.  This is not the case in actuality.  The truth is, when we act as if we were happy, those actions contribute to creating a sense of happiness. 

            If you feel you need help in order to act happy, first relax by taking deep breaths.  No one ever taught me how to breathe – I just did it instinctively.  Imagine my surprise when I found out I was not doing it correctly!  The appropriate way is when we take a deep breath, our stomach should protrude outwards and when we exhale, it should go back down. 

            Try lying down on the floor, right now.  Relax your body and begin to draw in a deep breath.  You can find your pulse with your fingers on your wrist, or on the side of your neck.  Try breathing in to the count of seven of your heartbeats, and then breathing out to the count of seven.  Pay attention to how the tummy rises when the breath enters, and how it recedes when the breath exhales. By repeating this several times, you become successful at slowing down and focusing your attention on your breath.  As a result, you are now no longer focusing your thoughts on any outside concerns; instead, you are focused in the present moment, and this is a huge step forward towards achieving a relaxed state.

            Once you feel fully relaxed, stand up with your feet flat on the ground and continue to breathe slowly, watching the breath come in as the tummy rises and seeing it recede as the breath leaves the body.  Next, you can increase your positive energy with some exercises in visualization.  We know that the core of the center of the earth is molten magma.  Visualize your feet growing roots down into the earth and see this hot golden energy rising up from the depths and penetrating into your body, growing in intensity as it moves up through your feet.  Now raise your hands over your head, as if you are reaching for the stars.  Picture yourself gathering up the energy of all the light in the cosmos – the stars, the sun, the moon - and visualize that revitalizing  white light flowing down your arms and into your body.  Within your tummy, the healing white light from above mixes and melds with the force of the golden magma energy coming up from below, filling your body and imparting to you a feeling that combines peaceful energy with powerful energy.

            Now that you have accessed your calm, peaceful yet powerful energy, think about something or someone that makes you smile.  For many, thinking about the unconditional love of a pet brings on a grin.  Philosopher Thich Nhat Hanh says scientific studies have shown that by arranging your mouth into a slight smile, you start to feel better, encouraging a feeling of happiness.

            Why is it important to find happiness?  It is not just so that you can feel better – it is also so the world can be a happier place.  Your attitude affects everyone you come in contact with, and you have the ability to lift someone up or to drag them down, simply with your behavior.

            One of my favorite bumper stickers says “Look for the good and praise it.”  When you turn your attention to looking at the brighter side, finding those things that support you and help you, you can find the world a kinder, more pleasant place to be.  It all starts with turning up the ends of your mouth in a slight smile, and seeing where this exercise can take you.  



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